Getting help - or not

From a previous life, on an operational tour in the army, I recall my boss returning from a visit to Headquarters, where he was seeking support for a particular task the regiment had been given.

Looking totally frustrated, he reported that he had been offered all possible assistance - apart from any practical help.

Why is it that so often this seems to be what happens to us, as the parents of a school refuser? Reading a recent entry in the Forum, I see that this is once again the case.

Oh dear!

The Children's Legal Centre

One of the problems we face as parents of a school refuser is getting the right help and support. Things become more difficult when we begin to face legal threats.

The Children's Legal Centre is a unique, independent national charity concerned with law and policy affecting children and young people.

Their aims and objectives are:

• To promote and uphold children's rights within the context of UN Convention on the Rights of the Child and the European Convention on Human Rights in the UK and internationally.
• To monitor and develop law, policy and practice concerning children and young people, to inform and influence policy makers and the general public.
• To improve access to justice through legal advice, information and representation for children, young people and adults working on their behalf.
• To publish a range of legal guides and information on child law, policy and practice.
• To carry out research in the field of child law to assist policy reform and the application of law relating to children.
• To provide technical expertise and training programmes to states, Inter-Governmental Organisations, Non-Governmental Organisations and United Nations agencies.

I have no experience of this organisation, but they might be worth a try. I would welcome any feedback.

http://www.childrenslegalcentre.com

Nicknames

40 years ago, I was given a nickname. It was not unusual for my peers to have and to use nicknames, but, although it was not especially unkind, I found it embarrassing and unpleasant.

I was reminded of this reading through 'a site for children/teenagers who are scared of school for various reasons, or anyone who has been affected by the fear of school'. One of the people who run the site, Lisa, suffered bullying at school with her peers chanting her nickname.

Scared-of-school.webs.com is a well laid out site with a forum and chat room. How well the latter is used, I cannot say, but this may well be a place for our children and young people to go when they are looking for peer support.

One of the problems they face is the loss of contact with their friends. At Scared-of-school.webs.com there is a chance they might build new relationships with people who can help.

Of course, we need to be careful that other users are who they say they are, and normal safety rules for using network sites must apply.

That nickname? Walking along a street last year with friends, I saw a beggar, who recognised me, and called out to me using my nickname! Ouch!

The HandsOnScotland Toolkit is an online resource for anybody working with children and young people. The website was developed by Playfield Institute (NHS Fife) in partnership with Barnardo's and the University of Dundee. It was commissioned by HeadsUpScotland, the national project for children and young people’s mental health.

One of their toolkits is designed to help professionals working with children and young people who refuse to attend school. There are a number of suggestions that will work well for parents, including tips on counselling. How many of us have got into that confrontation from which there is no escape?

Some of the suggestions may seem out of kilter with the advice we give each other here, but perhaps we have got it wrong? I wonder what you think...

Helping a child or young person who refuses to go to school

Scottish Government initiative to encourage parents to seek help

This week, through their 'Smarter Scotland' project, the Scottish Government is tell parents to 'Just ask'.

They say that:
"...support can be provided in a variety of ways to meet the individual needs of the child. That could mean dedicated help in the classroom or access to specialised equipment but there are many other types of help available as well. If you think your child could benefit from assistance, it's easy to get things started.

"The best way is to contact their school. However, you can also visit the Enquire website for more information and advice on what to do next.

"In the next few months we'll be taking our roadshow out across Scotland to talk about additional support for learning.

"Whatever the circumstances, Additional Support for learning is available to help you and your child. All you have to do is ask."

A section on the STV website has been set aside for real life stories of people who have benefited from additional support.